So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
