Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
