I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
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