Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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