Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Randomize
