Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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