just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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