got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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