is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Randomize
