i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
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