You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Randomize
