doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
That's intense
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
