I think I am morally bankrupt
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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