Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Randomize
