I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
I think I sprained my soul last night
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Randomize
