But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
