some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize