Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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