I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Randomize
