I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
