Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize
