i think my tv is drunk
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize
