i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
Randomize