I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
