I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Randomize
