who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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