I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
vagina is talking i cant
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
