Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Randomize
