I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Randomize
