quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
