I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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