This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize
