I'm jealous of your bromance
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
