I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Randomize
