I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize
