If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
