Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Randomize
