I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
smell my finger.
he was CRYING into my vagina
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Randomize
