Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Randomize
