Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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