I wish I could punch you in the face.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
a search helicopter?!
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
