she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I am available for nakedness
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
