But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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