soooo we both peed the bed last night...
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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