Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
My vagina is very pro this idea
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
