So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
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