Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
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