i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
