I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
