**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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